My Girl and I
Here's a scene in
My Girl and I that I thought was particularly clever or cheesy depending on your attitude. When Su-ho was young, a blind person asked him the question, "Does the rain fall in drops or does it fall in threads?" Su-ho said the rain falls in drops. But later on he got to thinking that maybe it does fall in threads. How would you know for sure? So even I thought for a moment, of course it falls in drops... right? Years later he's standing by the window with Su-eun staring at the rain. He tells her about that blind person's question. Then asks her, "When can I find out?" So she leans in and kisses him. Made me squeeze my pillow and go ahhhhhh like a teenage girl. This is why I watch romantic movies. In case, you can't see the picture. The rain is frozen in droplets.
Back to not caring
There were 2 posts I made last month that caused quite a stir in my small community of friends. While I thought I knew what I was doing, people told me otherwise. There was a fair amount of gossip. Namely, I'm creepy. Or, I don't know how to express myself clearly. Or I like her a lot. Or countless other things that I didn't want to face. I went ahead and believed what people interpreted from my posts. Pretty stupid now that I think about it. Who else would understand a passage more than the author himself? But since it was a fairly unanimous agreement from all those who read it and I go with majority rules, I believed it. I went into a mode of how I can change myself and loathing myself for being so .... emotionally crippled.
I finally found enough courage a couple of days ago and reread what I wrote. You know what? Those words were not ambiguous. They were straight from the heart. I saw little that could be construed as proclamation of love. There is an amendment I would like to make though. When I wrote, "As she leaves, it takes everything I have not to follow her." I probably should have more clearly identified that she represented the home I left behind. I felt so alone that week that I really just wanted to go home among family and friends. Right in front of me was a free ride back to where I never knew I was most comfortable.
So screw you all and now I start it up again.
The best part of my weekend was standing on the beach with Y-Y as the waves crashed up angrily at our feet. I was content in where I am watching the sand disappear beneath my feet. The words exchanged in those precious few moments made me realize what she meant to me and what we had together. I stared deeply into the endless horizon and standing next to me was someone who understood me deeply to where the oceans meet the sky.
If she were here
I could picture it already.
If she were here, she would sit down on the sofa next to me and curl up her legs. She would have just come out of the showers after coming home from work. The smell of fresh soap would waft in the wake of her movements. She would be wearing a plain long white sweater that comes down over her thighs and a pair of shorts that you could hardly see under her sweater. She would then progress to massage my shoulders as I try to concentrate on the program on TV. "Come on tell me," she would plead.
I don't usually consider myself the funny one but I guess I play the role pretty well when no one else occupies the spot. A few years ago in mandarin class, we had to do a little speech in front of class completely in mandarin. I thought, it would be quite boring to have people concentrate on what I was trying to say. If I could liven up the mood with some jokes or pictures that would make it more entertaining. The effect was better than I thought and I illicited laughter from just about everyone in class. People laughing not at me but at what I was saying. How novel! A year later the tactic repeated itself in my speech class. This time I garnered even greater amusement. People wrote me little notes afterwards to tell me how much they enjoyed my speech and how much they laughed. Hey, do I have a career here? I can make people laugh. At least I know I'm not always the monotone boring guy.
So last night at the Banquet, I was asked to say a few words about the graduating seniors. I immediately worked on my comedy routine. I was worried all day because I didn't finish my speech until the 11th hour. Everything worked out better than before. I got the loudest and greatest roar of laughter ever. I was quite pleased at myself. Especially considering the fear I have of speaking in front of people. Like I said already, someone actually walked up to me to tell me how much she enjoyed my little antic. I'm glad. Everyone was commenting on how well I did.
So
if she were here, I'd tell her about it. But that wouldn't be enough for her. She'd then want me to repeat the speech verbatim because she doesn't believe I can be funny. She wants to judge for herself. Of course, I don't want to repeat my speech. I'm trying to watch TV here. She'd keep pushing and prodding me until I relent. But, of course, she knows my weakness and immediately goes after my shoulders. He hands feel so good on me. How can I say no to magic like that. So in the end I budge.
I do my routine and she claps loudly and holds in her stomach. "HAHAHAH, oh it hurts, my stomach hurts, I can't believe you said that... HAHA!" It would be nice
if she were here so that I could tell her how my day went.
The Physics Club or Physics Records
The title is a play on The Breakfast Club and Empire Records. But there's not much I can do with it. Anyway, today started off pretty drearily. I didn't have a very good night's sleep. My roommate is near the end of his clothes washing cycle. Meaning he has a mound of dirty clothes in the corner of the room. The stink is incredible. It rained a few days ago so although there was a nice hazy gray cloud above Los Angeles this morning, the high humidity killed any good sensation I could get out of it.
8:30 AM
I awoke contemplating skipping class but Dr. Paulson was going to pass back our final roughdrafts today. I had to get it to begin the final draft of my research paper due in one week. Class was as miserable as I thought it would be as Dr. Paulson lashed us mercilessly with how dreadful the papers he received were. Worse yet, he hadn't finished reading my paper yet and asked all those who didn't receive their paper to come back after class and he will grade it in front of us. You know what that means. He's gonna tell you just how bad you did right in front of your face.
9:50 AM
As we began our peer reviews, it happened. It was all so sudden that it made me realize that today was no ordinary day. Brenda came over and sat down next to me. Who's Brenda? She's just about the hottest girl I have ever seen. That's who. She's like a movie star. She should be modeling not taking Chemistry classes. Seriously, what is someone this good-looking doing here? But of course she wasn't interested in me, she was interested in gossipping with Adekunbi who sat in the other seat next to me. Because I was talking to Adekunbi at the time, I was allowed into Brenda's chat also. Meaning when she spoke, I could freely look at her lovely face. Her perfect lips. Her round eyes. Her straight white teeth. Oh it was wonderful. And since she wasn't speaking directly to me, I could actually utter a few words into the conversation because I could look at Adekunbi while doing this.
10:30 AM
After class, I went downstairs to my research meeting. I was a bit apprehensive at first because my work for the week was a little dubious. I was supposed to calculate the temperature of some dust in some region of space. I got 17 K for one pair of wavelenghts and 26 K for another pair of wavelengths. That's a pretty large margin of error and I was afraid what my professor would say when she hears it. Turns out I was supposed to get that. The Planck function that I used to calculate the temperature is supposed to vary with wavelengths. She then goes into detail about my next task that I won't bother boring you with. Needless to say. Thumbs up.
11:30 AM
I saw some elementary school age kids at the exploratorium as I walked out of the lab. Oh yeah, there's a field trip today. I decide to go inside and see if I could play with some of the stuff. My favorite exhibit is the one where there are two tubes with a styrofoam block and feather in each tube. One tube has all the air sucked out of it. The other tube is normal. When you flip them over, the feather and the block falls at the same speed in the tube with no air. Thus showing that everything falls with the same speed regardless of mass. So I just played with all the different exhibits and helped some of the kids there. Dr. Bernal approaches me 30 min later and hands me a coupon for a free combo meal at Carl's Jr. I didn't volunteer much so I felt a little guilty but since this is free from Carl's Jr. Why not?
12:30 PM
At the physics club meeting, Priscila is there and wants to talk some more about our Physics banquet later this evening. The Banquet is the theme for today's post. I was already a little nervous about having to introduce two people tonight. I wanted to do something funny the name Physics Banquet automatically induces a coma. All of sudden, I get appointed further people to introduce. Do these people realize I am not good talking in front of an audience? Don't they know I revert to some crude chinese-accented English when I get nervous? So anxiety overcame the previous good feelings of this morning.
1:20 PM
Priscila runs into Misrati (Not sure I got her name right) She's an exotic looking Ethiopian girl. Quite gorgeous. She works at the financial aid office and is on lunch so she decides to join us. Amazingly, she actually wanted to hear what a bunch of Physics nerds talk about. Since she sat next to me, her attention was on me most of the time. And since she was hot, my attention was on her. Of course, I pulled out my favorite line as of late. "I work at NASA and will send a probe up into space." That always results in the requisite, "Wow." I feel kinda shallow, but I am telling the truth after all. My self-esteem goes back positive.
2:10 PM
Chris, Priscila, and I decide to go to the library and work on our itinerary for tonight. Their constant bickering with each other was such great entertainment. Chris sends me an article that a reporter wrote about him last week. It was very insightful and should help me in my speech later tonight about him. I then realize I only have a couple hours to revise my speech. I also forgot that I started a rough draft of it at my research lab all the way at the other side of school. I cursed my forgetfullness and trudge back to the Physical Sciences building.
3:00 PM
Since, I was there, what the heck. I'll go get my paper from Dr. Paulson. Oh ,was I ever wrong about my assessment of him. The guy genuinely wants to help and yes he is frustrated about the lousy work he receives. But he's also kind and considerate and wants to help me write a good paper. He gave me so many insights. This paper is difficult to write because it deals with a lot of chemistry that bores me to death. I don't understand what's going on in the experiment. I just BS'd most of it. Now I believe I have to do tools to do a good job worthy of Dr. Paulson.
3:30 PM
I run into Adekunbi and she laments about how she has to go to the bank to pay her fees. I offer to give her a ride to the bank even though I could see the looming deadline for my speech. Adekunbi is cool. She's always so open about what is bothering her and I just enjoy listening and giving advice whenever I can. We run into a cute Asian girl in a brand new camry with a busted right corner. It's even missing a hubcap at that corner. She and her friend wanted to know where the volleyball courts were at. Hey, I'm only too happy to oblige a pretty face. We arrive at Adekunbi's bank which turns out to be the CalstateLA credit union. Odd, why isn't it
in the school?
4:20 PM
I'm in trouble now, I need to head out in about an hour and I still haven't finished my speech. I looked at what I had and scratched my head wondering what I could add to it. I got sidetracked and started downloading Witchblade and chatting to Jack. Before I knew it, the clock struck 5:20. Oh well.
5:40 PM
I arrive at Almmansor Court to meet my doom. People were going to show up late anyway so I used the opportunity to finish my speech. Miraculously, God gave me the words I needed right at 6:00 PM as guests arrived. Now I am ready. The Banquet turned out great. Food was good. Company was fantastic. There was more faculty than students, unfortunately.
9:30 PM
I come home pretty exhausted. I've been walking and talking to dozens of people all day. I've rarely socialized this much in all my life. My speech was a resounding success and everyone applauded my comedic debut. It's gonna be tough to outshine this year's banquet. And I'll probably be the one to organize it next year because the current organizers will graduate in two weeks.
In order of appearance, today's cast members include Kumar, Adekunbi, Jessica, Amritpal, Ramone, hot babe Brenda, James, Feng, Dr. Terebey, some elementary school kids, Swapneel, Chris, Dr. Bernal, Andrea, Priscila, Michael W, exotic girl Misrati, a friendly girl in chemistry class whom talked to me while we waited for Dr. Paulson, Dr. Paulson, some guy in the elevator whom said I could volunteer at County USC Hospital for free, some Asian girl in a dented Camry, Michael P, Dawit, Sara, Anne, Dr. Zhao, Dr. Cohen, Dr. Taylor, Dr. Van-Buren, Robert Stringer's mom whom enjoyed my little comedic spiel, Dr. Al-Jishi, Maxime. And now I can sleep.
Depression Quest
I can finally rest. Two nights of nonstop reading has finally produced a free moment of rest. It's very fleeting, however, as finals are only a blink of an eye away. I hope to get some preliminary work done this weekend. I serious doubt it though since I procrastinate like no tomorrow.
What is normal?
I scheduled with Mike a couple of weeks ago to meet and have lunch at noon every Tuesday and Thursday. He agreed quite readily. Truth be told, I was just tired of him coming to class late and then complaining about hunger pains. Worse yet, he sometimes just eats his meal during class. Very disruptive. So I wanted to help him out. If he had lunch with me 40 min before class, he would be on time and he would have eaten. Plus, he would look better in the eyes of the teacher. Win win right? Two weeks later, we've met only once and he was 30 min late. So he didn't finish his food in time. I even stayed with him so that we could go to class together late. But at 10 after, I just gave up as I saw no intention in him to hurry at all. He ended up coming 30 minutes late to class. I asked him about why he didn't at least call me to tell me we wouldn't meet that first Tuesday. His response was, "You're a good friend so I thought there was no need to call since I would see you later anyway." He said he thought this was a normal thing people do. I said unequivocably that
because I am a good friend you doubly need to make sure you call me when you flake on me. Let me know next time. Next time is today and he was MIA again. Didn't show up to class or call. I'm not ready to give up on him yet but since I see no effort on his part, this will probably be useless.
Here's also another anecdotal thing. A friend of mine who also battled with mild bouts of depression like me had one thing in common. We were both very modest and owned up to our shortcomings trying to change them. Mike is like Brandon, they're both depressed in my eyes but they're both also very arrogant and proud. Maybe that's what's preventing them from coming out of their shell. Feels like I am fighting another losing battle. Never Give Up! Never Surrender!
Goals
You know those episodes of sitcoms where a character goes, "What have I done with my life? I haven't even finished everything on my list." Do people actually make lists? Does Mandy Moore really wish to be in two places at once? That state border thing was so lame. Anyway, I sorta have a list. A few things in my mind I always want to accomplish. Let me count the ways.
1. Find meaning to my life - done
2. Ski down the main cliff at Heavenly - done
3. Skydiving - in progress
4. Work at JPL - Coming soon
5. Fall in love - done
6. Live in a bachelor's pad - Coming soon
7. Finish Simon's Quest, Dragon Warrior 2, Friday the 13th, and Phantasy Star 2 - only have PS2 to go
8. Scuba diving
9. Climb a mountain so high it takes days to get to the top
10. Fall in love again
Looks like 10 will be my toughest one because Mandy says I am picky.
Superman trailer makes movie look bad
Why is that when a young hot female tv star hits it big, their first major motion picture has to be of the horror variety? Is it because their fans are the teenage variety? They have to have some kinda link? Young people like seeing pretty people run for their lives? My Kirsten Bell of famed
Veronica Mars will be starring in a horror flick,
Pulse, next month. Maggie Grace did
The Fog. Sarah Michelle Gellar did
I Know What you did Last Summer. Katie Holmes did some awful sixth sense movie where she bared her chest to get killed. It's just something I noticed. It works well for some people Sarah for one. Well I stopped watching Kirsten when Veronica got together with the bad boy for no reason near the end of season 1. It was just so messed up that I couldn't stand it. Someone as cool as Veronica cannot like a douche bag like him.
The eel fish fried rice I had over the weekend was amazingly good. I can't believe all the stuff we ordered amounted to only $25. I definitely have to visit that restaurant again. It's the first place I went to where I liked the ramen.
Sleep becomes me.
"elalator" go up!
Just as my heart went empty she came by this weekend with another dozen units. Mmmmm, I'll kick this vice someday but for now, I'm gonna enjoy my sugar carbonated paradise. How about this; if you won't go into Silent Hill to find me, I won't drop my 2-liter addiction to pull you up from sinking snow. Since the chances of either occurence is near zero, love is conserved.
I realized why I can't think straight the past week. It's a case of too much stuff. I'm letting too many things bother me. That with the impending doom of finals and multitude of reports to do is slowly eating away at my attention span. I just don't have time for petty feelings and misinterpreted emotions. Obenkyo! Obenkyo! Obenkyo! So goodbye lonesome confusion and hello retarded time (That's an electrodynamic term in case you thought I was being poetic.)
J'aime la pluie. I wish it would rain more often then my head would clear under the clouds. Stupid weather, why must you affect me in such negative ways. If that's the case, I think I will have to procure a place under the constant fog of San Francisco Bay.
It is illegal to be this kawaii. I admit it, I'm an otaku. I want to go to one of these restaurants that Densha Otoko goes to.
Sunday's quick escape
One of the things that sucks when you see someone doing something completely stupid and irresponsible as driving too fast is knowing that you will repeat the same feat in the same position. Who am I to lecture someone on "get there late or get there never" when I myself am guilty of the same pleasure? As I try to muster up the words of parents, the hypocrisy inside me quells them before they even have a chance to come out. I've heard too often, "Why don't you slow down?" "Why do you live life so dangerously?" If I don't cut myself, how do I feel the pain? Chi gik. Without it, I wouldn't know I am alive. It's stupid. It's reckless. I know. But, it's the way I am. I can't give up the challenge. So in 3 weeks time, You will see a blue streak cross the flat fields of California trying to break 4 and 23
Saturday is a ride
I feel a huge burden has been lifted off my shoulders. Finally, it is done and over with and I don't have to think about it anymore. It actually turned out better than I thought it would so I am glad. Now I can concentrate on life's other challenges.
I did some volunteer work today to pass my usually empty weekends. It was fun watching kids come up to the counter asking questions about why this or that worked. Our physics table was quite popular due to our many props and demonstrations. Although in reality we probably just interested the people. No one would actually want to major in phyics. Right? What disturbed me was the general state of physics minded people. Did I mention that 4 out of the current 8 or 10 upper division undergrads are weird? Weird as in they don't show up to class and suddenly quit midway and come back next year. They are also the world's leading flakes. Some take only 2 classes a quarter but seems to have no life. It's odd personalities. I wonder if there are lot of those types in the other sciences. Anyway, we had 4 professors and 2 students including me at 9 AM. By 10AM, I was the only one manning the table. What gives? They all just disappeared without a word. I found out later that 2 professors and the other student were covering another exhibit. Still, not nice leaving me all alone there. Students are like that. Professors are like that. Physics people are weird.
University Police
I've just proved that university police have nothing better to do than harass students. It is 11:30PM in a deserted parking lot. There's maybe 20 cars in a lot that can hold 300. I pull up next to my friend's car so he can go home. During the next 10 seconds, my friend starts unbuckling his seatbelt to go out. A squad car pulls up in front of me and turns on his lights. "Park your car or pull off the right side of the road!" Are you serious? There is no one here. It is near midnight and you are going to do this to me? Do you see my passenger getting up to leave. Does it look like I am gonna park here? Geez, I mean technically I shouldn't be sitting here but come on, it's a parking lot and there is no one around. Nothing to do, the guy had nothing to do. He just had to exercise his authority to get some practice.
The Lethargy of John Tsan
With relief, I saw Mike today and said, "I guess you must have been sick the past 3 days."
He replied with a, "Well, not really."
Crap, what do you say to that? Oh, "Then what's wrong?" That's not me. I'm not a girl or a counselor. I'm just glad he's back in school. Me, on the other hand might have some issues. I had "napped" earlier in the afternoon around 2PM for a few hours because I was oh so tired. I woke at 6PM not feeling like doing anything. So I laid in bed watching Fate Stay Night all night not doing much of anything. At the crack of 11:30AM I turned in because that would be 8 hours before my alarm clock comes on. Ring ring goes the bell and I stared at the clock. I'm so tired. I think I will skip morning class and just go to lab. I set the clock at 12PM. Ring Ring, what the heck time to wake up already? I angrily trudged to school in a dream-like state. After class at 4:30 I decided to take another "nap." I awoke at 6:30. So when I do up the math. I slept 15 hours plus yesterday. And I am still tired. I'm beginning to think some Masters are having their Servants suck life out of me to replenish their Mana.
On that point, you should all do yourself a favor and download "The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya." You'll thank me. I'm thanking Nam. This anime is incredible. It brings in aspects from many different genres and puts them all together and then tears them to shreds by point out their cliches. We got our high school setting for modern day recognition. We have robots for the scifi geeks. We have big breasted girls for the perverts. We have espers for the fantasy goers. We have suspense drama for those who like a mystery. We have sports and we have vacations. We can go from serious in Nagato to hilarity in Kyon. At the center of all this we have Haruhi Suzumiya. The girl you shouldn't allow to get bored.
On not being nice
I saw a girl yesterday carrying a big plastic bag of laundry in one hand and various assortment of books on the other arm. She dropped down every 10 feet or so to rest the hand carrying the bag. She obviously needed some help. The road to the parking lot would be a long one. My head was fixed towards her as I slowly walked past her without saying anything. I did not stop or offer any sort of help. If you saw my head, it would be like in a car watching an accident on the road. My head turns toward the site as I pass by. Why didn't I help her?
Mike hasn't shown up for 3 days now. I pray he is alright. I've begun to realize to my detriment, the power of my words. It's one of the reasons why I don't tell it as it is. Maybe I sound too intelligent. Maybe people look too far into what I say. But it seems that when I say something, people take too much heed. Who am I to judge you, right? All too often, I find myself correct in my assessment. Maybe that's why people listen. I wish I was just full of it because I tend to notice the negatives, but I never spot the positives. I was asking Mike if he could shape up for the last two weeks of class. He can still get an A if he tries. People and professors have been saying things to me and each other about his lack of performance in class. I want to help him, so I told him what he could do to make himself look good in class. I mean, it's very simple. I've been pretending to be a good student for quite a few years. All you have to do is show up to class and be awake. This little peptalk last week led him to ask me what I thought of him. You ask, I'm gonna tell you. Not pretty. He laughed in my face some of the things I thought about him. So maybe everything is fine. He's probably out sick with bronchitis.
You like my pity post two days ago? I knew what I was writing and I guessed on what the results would be. I debated if I should still post it or not. I decided to go ahead with it because my post was short that day and I needed more filler. Now I am just a spoiled little brat. awwwwww....
Hiking at Eaton Canyon
Went hiking at Eaton Canyon with Mandy and Chris over the weekend. Chris is my classmate. There are programs at CalstateLA where you can enter college without going to high school. Chris is one of the 100 or so "EPsters" here on campus. If only I knew of such a program back in San Jose, I could skip the peer pressure of highschool and get my bachelors at age 17. Chris is going down to UCSD for his PhD next fall. Lucky guy. I still have another year to suffer at this lousy school. The hike was extremely enjoyable with a grand view of a humble little waterfall. We waded a bit in the water. Mandy's foot fell in twice. I helped her get over a few rocks. She never accepts help usually. I had to burst her bubble when she said, "Hey, that old man got up here." The hike was actually pretty easy, it was just a lot of stream crossing. She thought it was a fairly difficult hike. We had Soup Plantation afterwards and Chris showed me something I haven't seen in awhile: the size of a person's appetite when they still have some growth left. Wai Kin showed me the progress of his Invisalign treatment. His teeth seem irregularly shaped but other than that, there is marked improvement. It was odd though, when I first met him two years ago, I thought he was Mandy's little brother. Now he seems to be sprouting wrinkles everywhere. He looks 30 something now. Wonder why.
Here's a good joke I saw on the board of Chem360.
Why did the white bear dissolve in water?
Because it's a polar bear.
Non chemistry people need not apply
May 15th ramblings
Last Saturday was one of those odd days my phone rang off the hook, literally vibrated itself off my desk to the floor. 6 different people wanted to contact me that day. They all staggered their calls pretty well too, 1 hour in between. Being popular is cool.
I was so turned on last Friday, when Jean said, "Before I answer you, first, tell me how have you been." This was in response to my question about how her day was. I was trying to strike up a conversation with her and she blew me away. A girl that doesn't like hearing herself talk about herself? Have I died and gone to heaven?
I was more than a little disappointed yesterday. I had canceled my plans for volunteer work at JPL the coming weekend in anticipation. Time is of the essence so I decided I would do something special. Someone beat me to it. And I worked so hard to swap schedules with people this weekend too. That's why you don't get worked up for things. Feeling a bummed today. God sent me some gifts. Virtua tennis, a rebate check, stipend paycheck, and a wedding invitation. Yup, Someone doesn't want me to be sad. I'll take it! Match Point!
Of cars and girls
She drives into the night.
I like how Lucy leans on the center armrest so she could be closer to me when we talk.
I like how Kim hums the tune of my music even though she doesn't know what the lyrics mean showing that she is trying to enjoy my music.
I like how Nga drives a manual car. Women who drive stick are hot.
I like how Ying-Ying tells me to drive slower over speed bumps in her car and yet she rips through the highway at 90+ mph.
I like how Aube said she will start driving me everywhere when she gets a car. She was true to her word even though we didn't see much of each other by then. She drove as often with me as possible.
I like how Lee let's me drive her car. Having someone's trust feels good.
I like how Nancy always cut people off and but doesn't let them in. Girls that are aggressive when they drive are entertaining to watch.
I like how Mandy asks me what I want to listen to when she is behind the wheel. Makes me feel welcome in her car.
I like how Marie picks me up when we go places. Girls who drive me are sexy.
I like how Hoang puts regular in her Lexus. She saved me a lot of money because I learned you don't need premium in your car.
I like how Yen spent the day with me while I ran around doing errands one day. Spending time with her is always fun.
I like how Sharlene was laughing as I tried to back out of my parking spot. You won't see me stalling in reverse anymore.
I like girls and I like cars. Putting them together is like hot fudge on a sundae.
Scrabble
Last Friday, I had dinner with Y-Y, Jack, and Pak. I felt a little awkward. They were supposed to go see MI3 but suddenly decided not to. I hope I'm not the reason they decided against it. I'd hate for people to change their schedules just to accomodate me. Although, I heard Nga canceled so that may be a reason for the switch. I wanted Tung Kee but instead we went to some expensive sushi place. I already don't like japanese food and to pay that much for it was hard to swallow. Soba, thumbs down for you kid. I tried you cold and I tried you hot. You suck. I'd rather have a hu tieu xao or however you spell it. It was an interesting group dynamic. It seemed the 3 of them had already formed their little clique with hand gestures and code words. I was unable to decipher anything. We played scrabble afterwards which wasn't all that fun because you could see Pak not really enjoying himself wanting to go home. I thought I could spice it up a bit with some Family Guy. Z 4 Q Q Q and a batman symbol. Jack is my new nemesis. I could only match his points every turn but I couldn't overtake him. We picked up the game at Nam's place but I was cursed with AAOIOU for most of my turns so I took my chance to end the game early instead of losing, hehehe. It was a good day for coming back.
Pho ga
Kim, Nam and I had some good pho ga Sunday morning. I was actually pretty shocked they were awake. I guess they're like me, stuck in this ritual that you have to wake around 8 or so since that is the time for work. I was wondering if I should call the other trio but I thought there was no need. I was with them earlier and this gives me more chance to talk to Kim and Nam personally. That and since none of them called me means they were piss drunk or likely stayed up all night. I'm not used to seeing Kim with a short haircut and she inhaled fruit rollups like it was nothing. As we talked I realized I didn't agree much with anything either of them were saying. It seemed to make sense but my experience has taught me that their way just doesn't work. I would go into detail but it's not really all that important. My friends are a constant pool of swirling emotions and varied thinking. Everyone's tastes and feelings seems to be in constant flux. I wonder what happens next month to what they think. MI3 was good, on par with part 1. Only problem is that the whole some higher up in your department is betraying you theme is quite old.
Success!
That's the probe I will be sending into space. Sounds cooler than it is. I'm probably just working on some tiny telescope in some obscure part of the probe.
Last Friday, JPL called me to do an interview. That's Jet Propulsion Laboratory which is the name of the NASA facility down here near Pasadena. The one in San Jose is called Ames Research Facility I think. The interview was for the summer internship that I would be doing there. I was given 4 choices.
1. Helioseismology - Separate those words, sun and quakes. So I would be working on something that has to do with the motion of the sun.
2. Interferometry at Mt. Wilson - This one is interesting because I will be working the graveyard shift since all data has to be taken at night. I will be basically sitting under a telescope all night recording stuff. It's intense work so they have a dorm set up in the mountain. I bring food and stuff and stay there 3 days of the week. That's the romantic astronomer view I always had of myself. Sitting under the stars at night and watching the sun rise ruining my good time.
3. Cosmic rays - I will be going from many locations all over Los Angeles collecting modules or fixing modules that are recording the number of cosmic ray hits.
4. SIMS planet finder mission - Send a rocket up into the sky
Given those 4 choices, it was pretty obvious what I wanted to do. I had to stick with 1 and 4 because I wanted to be on JPL campus. The other two were offsite. I hope to be able to mingle with people and hopefully get some networking done. I chose 4 because it's so much easier to tell people I am sending a probe into outer space when they ask me what I do instead of saying helioseismology and looking at their clueless stares.
So I went down to JPL to talk to the manager of that project and had a chat with him. I don't know what is wrong with me. I just don't do well in interviews. I should practice mock interviews more often with my sister. She's the best. Anyway, I wasn't able to answer any of his questions correctly and somehow I got sidetracked into talking about how sometimes my data points don't look nice in lab. So I would just "massage" them a little to fit the curve. Baka! Baka! I also had an interview with the helioseismology guy since I was there, they decided it would be convenient.
Apparently, despite what I said I was able to garner an acceptable from both managers. Feels good to be wanted by both. I kid, It's probably more like, eh, he'll do. Whatever, good enough for me. I emailed Dr. Gillam my choice for this summer so I am now officially in for this summer. I'll start right after finals. 40 hours a week and I'll get $4000 stipend. Do the math and it's 10 bucks an hour. Not bad. Not as much as what the Honda guy wrote down for my loan on the Civic but it's NASA. It's so OOOOHHHHHHH.
Step 1: Apply to college
Step 2: Go to Los Angeles
Step 3: Intern at JPL
Step 4: Graduate
Step 5: Get a job at JPL
I'm well on my way.
Nam's birthday
Jack and Y-Y picked me up to go have tea with their classmates Tri and Angelina on Saturday morning. They were right Angelina is very stylish and good looking. Jack is just picky I guess. I felt like an ass during because I was just so nonchalant. I acted like I was all that but I was really just thinking about what I was going to do tomorrow. I didn't want to concentrate on what people were saying. The group dynamic didn't work well because Y-Y seems to only be able to focus a conversation directed to a single person. So no one else could get a relevant word in. Jack was being silent as usual. Binh looked uncomfortable. So I felt like I had to start with asking the usual questions. "What do you do?" or "Where did you go to school?" Problem is that I forgot Angelina's name. I don't even know if that is her name as I write this right now but it doesn't matter now, close enough. So I had to get her attention and then ask. Conversation flowed a little more smoothly then because people generally like to talk about themselves and if you ask questions they like it even more. All in all, a great meetup although my plan to make fun of my friend's style of dress versus her sophistication didn't pan out too well. I had it formulated in my mind but I got it all confused. And what the heck happened to Tri's Vette?
In the afternoon we went to Nam's BBQ. Stupendous as always. Food is excellent. His mom still remembers me. We segregated into two groups but it couldn't be helped. It was tough to get an in with the other people and vice versa. Kinda disappointed Hau and Y-Y's coworker didn't show up. I was expecting hooking up action. I fell asleep on Nam's bed. I was so exhausted.
I was hesitant to go to AsiaSF because I didn't want to go clubbing afterwards. There would be no one to drive me home. I already don't like normal clubs, a gay club would just be worse. AsiaSF turned out to be a great restaurant but I think I've turned into an old fart. As fun as the entertainment was and the food, the place was just noisy and crowded. Kudos goes to Pak for sitting on the most UNCOMFORTABLE stool. It didn't have any place to rest your feet. You had to dangle your legs on the side. Not only that but his seat in the middle of the hallway meant he got plenty of elbows in the head. I know because I traded with him for a bit. I was tired of watching him squirm. Ten minutes of that and I couldn't do it anymore, I'd rather stand somewhere else. Got some nice hits on the side and a few sharp purses. Bill came out to a whopping $72 per person. My most expensive meal to date but worth every penny. Good company is priceless.
I actually changed my mind when we went to the club. The songs were great. Why can't they have this type of music at straight clubs instead of all that garbage hip-hop that I can't dance to. And I am not much of a dancer already so I need all the help I can get. And did anyone else notice how incredibly hot Jennifer Trinh was? I know she's a friend and all but hot DAMM! I agree with Steph, can't help but oggle a bit. She pulled me in to dance with her for a little bit so that was quite nice. I was reminded of this one time I was waiting outside at a school dance and this incredibly leggy gorgeous girl came walking from the parking lot. It was like a teen movie when the star of the show arrives at the party. All eyes were on her. And there was chatter among the guys. Who is she with? Why is she going to the dance alone? Wow, look at that butt. I was thinking I wish I knew a girl like that. I actually said this to my friend who was standing next to me. As everyone continued to watch, the girl walked straight up to me. I looked behind me nervously to see who she was smiling at. And it seemed like slow motion as she leaned in close to hug me. What the heck? I could feel all eyes on us. It felt weird. My friend stood next to me bewildered. The girl said, "Hi Pung, Nice to see you here." Something like that. "Yeah nice to see you too," I squeaked. She smiled again, turned around, and went into the dance. Took me about 10 minutes afterwards to realize it was Van. I know someone this good looking? Apparently I still do.
I rushed out a little early with Pak to leave and neglected to say bye to everyone properly. My bad, I had a terrible headache that was impacted by Kim's cranberry drink. It was so good I drank it all. But yeesh, what is wrong with my head? Instant headache when I touch alcohol. Curses to you Nam for telling me the label on the bottle says do not take and drink alcohol. I didn't know it was bad and always just took a couple of pills before I drink. Goodbye blissful ignorance. My head hurt so much I just wanted to go home and take some tylenol.
If this is any indication of future b-day parties, you can count me in for next year's bash.
Yardhouse
I got invited to a dinner among friends at the
Yardhouse last Saturday. While I only knew one of the 13 people there, the kindness of strangers made me feel welcome. Everyone else seemed to know only a few people there. The Yardhouse is a fantastic restaurant sorta like Gordon Biersch but they have a much larger variety of on tap beer. In fact, they are in the Guinness World Records for having the most: 250 kinds. The restaurant was also located in trendy downtown Pasadena where everything is happening at night. The whole area reminded me of Santana Row except this place was bigger and much more lively. My friend chose to sit at one end of the long table but you can't hear what everyone is saying all the way down here. I simply switched seats to the side of table with a stranger to my left and to my right. No worries, my small talk skills have already approached critical levels and I am quite comfortable mingling. It was so much fun talking to everyone around me. Once again, everyone spoke perfect english, well except for the Taiwanese guy but eh, I get to practice my mandarin so it was all good. Out of the 13 people there, 4 were software engineers. Wow, it's so nice to have a group of young adult professional asians enjoying a night out on the town. There was a really cute girl too. She was tall and slender. She had a small head. Anyway, it would be nice if I could assimilate into this group but I doubt I can since they all seemed just a tad older than me. Still, it's a glimpse into what my future will be like.
Hiking raises me up
Went hiking with Mandy on Sunday. Not sure why she is back but she was a breath of fresh air. We went up to Griffith Park to catch a glimpse of the Hollywood sign which oddly enough is not on Mt. Hollywood. Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, we arrived at such an early time that fog was still slinking it's way over the mountains. Good in that the hike was cool and breezy. Bad in that there was not much of a view. Ying-Ying might say the gray makes it hard to see without shades. But besides not being able to see past the cliffs, I loved it. The sun started to melt away the fog in the afternoon just as we started our descent. It was hot. Very hot, so I was glad we started at 8 in the morning. So I'm gonna leave the question of coming back to San Jose this weekend up to Mandy. If she goes with me then cool, we can share the expense. If not, I'm gonna stick around and hopefully organize a few things around my room. I just can't seem to justify the cost of coming back. I feel like such a pig.
Later, we had some com tom at a place on Del Mar and Valley. There's always a line outside so I thought it must be good. I wondered how it would compare to The com tam place on Tully, my personal favorite. Something I realized is that often when I go into a chinese place, say Tung Kee or Lion, the workers would start speaking to me in vietnamese. This irks me to no end. This is a chinese place afterall. But since I looked mi dang like a vietnamese, I accepted it. So as I walked into this place in San Gabriel, I got a, "Gay duo wei?" What the heck? Chinese in a vietnamese place? Sweet. This is why I like LA more than the Bay Area. Unfortunately, chinese people don't know how to make com tam. It could not compare at all with the place that always looks like it's on fire on Tully. You really need to have sear marks on your thit nuong.
Another observation is how much I miss Mandy. We, immediately, picked up where we left off commenting on how people dressed and how they put on make-up. Oh the joy of making fun of people. It's just so much more fun when someone is there to agree with you. That girl over there who looks so pale looks like she could be doing Kabuki theater. She wears so much powder I think it's flaking onto her soup. And why would you wear an evening dress to eat at a $5 a plate restaurant in the afternoon? I had a good day.
